Spiritual lessons come our way in every shape and form daily, if we take a moment to reflect on what is being presented instead of going into the automatic pilot of habitual reactions.

Lately Spirit has been showing me a karmic habit of mine I wasn’t aware of. This karmic pattern has deep roots in the family tree on my mother’s side.

This is the story of a spiritual opportunity or, as I often call it, a spiritual set up that happened to me recently.  My little Chihuahua, Georgy, has been banned from doggie day care because he attacked a dog and after the incident I was asked to keep him on a muzzle.  I tried putting a muzzle on him and each time he took it off within seconds. I felt the same way about a muzzle as he did so I decided to look for a reliable pet sitter to watch him while I am at work instead.

Yesterday I had scheduled an appointment at the library’s grounds with an older lady who does pet sitting. We had agreed to meet at 9:00 am and the library is behind my apartment building. She told me exactly where we would meet and I assumed that she meant the area next to the library where there is a beautiful Irises garden. So, Georgy and I walked from the apartment over to the garden ten minutes prior to the time. We waited and waited. 9 am came and went

“It is 9:05 am. Where is this woman?” my mind began to wander.

“People have no sense of responsibility these days!” the chatter continued in a frustrating crescendo.

“The least she could have done is let me know she was going to be late or not show up!” I could feel the entitlement coming in louder and stronger.

“Well, calm down now, people can be a little late. Things come up sometime. Just give her a chance.” A softer voice interjected.

 “I am going to give her fifteen minutes and if she doesn’t show I am leaving!” My righteous mind rebuked. I decided to write her a message letting her know I was waiting for her at the agreed upon spot.

A neighbor walked by with her dog and said hello and asked me what I was doing. I was ready to unleash upon her my frustration and have someone agree with me about how flaky people are these days. That would have made me feel good about the situation and would have given control back to me.

“I am waiting for someone I am supposed to meet here.” I said.

As soon as I was ready to tell my side of the story, I noticed an elderly woman calmly walking along the sidewalk towards us from the opposite side of the library.

“I guess she is here now.” I said as I walked up to her.

She smiled and very gently said that she had been waiting at the other side of the library just like she had written to me she would. She said she had received my message, saw me and came over instead.

She was nice, friendly and not at all judgmental about the mishap. She said she didn’t know there was such a beautiful Iris garden on this side of the library and she was glad to see it.

All my righteousness and judgment melted away in an instant as I recognized that the one on the “wrong” side was me and not her. So I apologized for assuming that she would be where the Irises were. She smiled and proceeded to meet Georgy who immediately loved her and wanted her to pick him up.

Yesterday morning I got more than a pet sitter, I received a very direct and loving lesson from Spirit and a warning that assuming I am right and correct may not be the case and even if it would be the case there are kinder ways of dealing with life’s curve balls instead of immediately going to war and assuming the worst of others. I have been contemplating on this pattern and realizing how deeply ingrained it is in my consciousness. 

I am grateful and very much humbled by the whole experience. I have to admit that this is not my first experience where my first and automatic inclination is to criticize and make others at fault. I am sure that there will be plenty more situations coming my way to continue to show me my karmic weakness and give me a fresh opportunity to change my response to a more balanced and neutral one.

Can anyone else out there relate?

Much love to all!


Back in 1994 I was attending the Barbara Brennan School of Healing in Long island. This required I travel once every three months from Honolulu, where I was living, to New York and spend one week at the school in Long Island.

This one time, I had just completed the week training and was home bound. I was feeling pretty exhausted and was looking forward to some rest during the long flight back to Hawaii.

I was very glad to see that my seat on the very last row of the plane had nobody else sitting next to it which meant I could stretch out along the three empty seats and get some needed sleep.

I noticed a man with a young boy settling into the seats on the opposite aisle. The boy was frantic and very unsettled and so was the dad trying his best to calm him down. I watched them make several trips to the restroom located behind our seats.

I decided not to pay attention to their commotion and instead settle into my space ready for takeoff. As soon as I closed my eyes the Holy Spirit nudged me to go talk to the man and let him know I could help him with the child.

Reluctantly I got up and introduced myself. “Hi there, my name is Kery. I noticed there is something troubling your child. I just finished one week of training in energy healing and perhaps I could be of assistance to you and your son.”

He looked at me trying his best to hide the deep sense of skepticism and horror my introduction was causing him. Politely he declined my help and thanked me.

“Just in case you change your mind, sir, I am sitting in the aisle next to yours.”

I felt relieved that he had rejected my help, probably thinking I was some kind of weirdo playing witchcraft. Now I could finally get to sleep.

I moved to the seat by the window waiting for the takeoff to be over so I would be able to lay down.

The plane had taken off and I could hear the dad still fussing around with the boy. Trips to the restroom were made time and again to no avail. Finally, I heard the flight attendant, who by the way had heard my introduction to the man, suggesting he would take me up on the offer.

I was still sitting by the window with eyes closed when suddenly a frightened boy was dropped on my lap and an exhausted father sank heavily on the seat next to mine.

“Okay, do your thing lady. I am at my wits end.”

The boy, an adorable eight years old, was frozen in terror sitting on the lap of a total stranger.

Needless to say, I was more terrified than both of them together.

What is one to do in such situation?

I did the only thing I knew. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and turned to God.

I connected to the boy’s emotional body.

“I want my mom! Why did mom take my brother with her and sent me on a plane with dad? I am afraid I am going to die and my mom is not with me.”

I felt this child’s terror and pain as I understood what was troubling him. Instinctively, I opened my heart just like a mother would and loved him.

I felt the warmth of Divine Love descend upon me and flow out of my heart to touch the frightened boy. As soon as he felt the divine touch, his body relaxed and he leaned back against my chest with a long sigh of relief.

“Your mom loves you very much. She will be waiting for you at home with open arms.” I whispered in his ear.

He turned around and hugged me while I gently stroked his head and gave him a tender kiss on the forehead.

I turned my head towards the father and found him and the flight attendant with mouths dropped and speechless.

“Okay lady, I don’t know what you just did but that was nothing short of a miracle. I have to admit I thought you were a little out there when you offered help. Please understand I am a medical doctor and do not believe much in this energy healing stuff. Today I stand corrected. Thank you so very much.”

We spent the next five hours of flight playing games and laughing. Even the flight attendant was included!

When we landed at the airport the dad asked me if I could watch the boy while he took care of some personal business.

The child was sitting on a stroller and he took a deep look at me and said, “Can you help me with something?”

“If I can I will be happy to do so.”

“I see monsters.” He blurted out and then paused to see my reaction.

“Go on.”

With a sigh of relief he continued, “They come and scare me all the time and I don’t know what to do.”

“Are there any monsters here at this moment?”


“Okay then. I want you to look at the monster and take a deep breath.”

“I am scared.”

“I know you are and I am telling you that it is okay to look at the monster even when you are afraid. I promise you that I am not going to let the monster hurt you in any way.”

“Okay. I will try.”

“Now, when you are looking at the monster I want you to call on the Holy Spirit for protection. Just say, “I love you God. Please embrace me with your light and grace.”

“I am scared.”

“Yes. Can you see the Light?”


“Okay, look at the Light and ask for It to embrace you with love.”

“That makes me feel good!”

“Can you ask the monster if he would like to come into the Light too?”

“I am scared of the monster.”

“Yes, however inside the Light and Grace of the Holy Spirit no harm can come to anyone.”

“Why would I want the monster to come into the Light? He is bad.”

“Yes, he is bad because he is scared and doesn’t know about the Love and the Light and the Grace of the Holy Spirit.” “Remember how scared you were in the airplane? Remember how angry you were at your mom and your dad? Then love touched your heart and changed you.  The same can happen to the monster if he allows for love to come into his heart. Sometimes monsters do and other times they don’t. Guess you will never know unless you try and ask, right?”

“Okay I will try.” He closed his eyes becoming very quiet.

“He left. He was scared of the Light and left.”

“Well, that is his choice and his freedom. At least you tried to help him. Maybe next time he will change his heart. The important thing is that now you know what to do when monsters come to scare you.”

“Yes! Thank you! I love you!”

“I love you too and I am so glad I met you and your dad. You made this trip a very special one!”

Dad came back and we exchanged phone numbers and names.

Before going our own ways, I asked the dad if it would be okay to have a picture taken of me and his delightful boy.

To this day whenever I look at that picture all I see is a brilliant light uniting our hearts in a warm embrace.

May The Blessing Be!


Divine Love in Action

They say that there is nothing more powerful than love. Love can move mountains and heal broken hearts; it can raise the dead, make miracles, cure the sick, the list goes on and on. In short, there is nothing that love can’t do. The love I speak of is Divine Love, the kind that just loves because it is ITS nature to do so; it expects nothing in return and it rejoices in giving.

Divine Love needs instruments for it to manifest in the physical realm. The one requirement to be a clear vehicle for the Divine is to have an open heart.

Recently, I was reminded of a couple of situations when I was able to experience firsthand and participate in the wondrous power of Love by choosing to be a channel for it.

A while back, I volunteered in the children’s room during a yearly spiritual seminar I used to attend. Many times I would be an activity leader for the age groups of 5-7 or 8-10 years old.

This one time I was volunteering during the evening session as support to the activity leader within a group ages 8-10. The children were asked to sit on the floor and quietly watch a movie. The woman in charge of the group had asked me to keep an eye on three boys who had been disruptive and misbehaving the entire day. Apparently, these three little guys had a reputation of working together and getting into fights with the other kids. “Keep them separate from the others. Stay with them all the way in the back of the room and be very firm with them. I want no more trouble. I have had enough of them already.” She addressed me and the kids.

 I took a moment to look at the boys as they were being scolded.  Something deep inside their eyes struck a familiar chord in my heart. I saw and felt their concealed pain and loneliness.

The woman stormed away to dim the lights in the room and start the movie.

The boys looked at me as if waiting to be scolded some more and to be escorted to the back of the room, away from everyone else. Instead, I sat down behind the last row of children, closed my eyes and turned to the Divine for help.

“Holy Spirit, please open my heart to love these boys. It seems that they really need to feel that they are loved right now.” I prayed.

I felt my heart open much like a flower ready to receive the warmth of sunlight in gratitude.

“Let Love Be” Spirit whispered in my heart. And so I did. With no expectation, no desires, I sat there and loved the children with all my heart.

At first, the three boys were taken aback from my lack of a usual engagement and stood there staring at me. Then, I heard them confabulate with one another, perhaps trying to figure out what I was up to and what would be the best strategy on their part.

Finally, there was silence and then a slow movement in my direction. The three of them surrounded me, two on each side and one in the back. They sat down and gently leaned their bodies and heads on me. I stroked their heads softly as a loving mother would do to her child. I felt their gentle and loving hearts melt together into the flow of Divine Love.  The three boys sat quietly throughout the movie taking in the love that the Holy Spirit was unconditionally and freely giving them.

My eyes happened to glance towards a far corner of the room to find the leader of the group watching in astonished disbelief the transformation that had taken place. I smiled at her and opened my heart to include her and the entire room in the circle of love. She smiled back as grace descended upon her and softened her entire body.

Divine Love is always present and as near as our own heart.

I will post the second story at another time.


I have been observing and working with my dreams for over twenty years. I have boxes full of dream journals. Yes, I used to write my dreams down by hand. Nowadays, I type them in my computer. Studying dreams can open one up to an entire new world. In my many years of recording dreams I have noticed recurring patterns, premonitions of future events. In my dreams I have attended classes in schools and universities that are out of this physical realm and learned about spiritual healing. I have visited amazing libraries that keep records of the history of our universe as well as those of universes we are not even aware of. In one such library I was allowed to look at my records, as Soul, and all the experiences I have had lifetime after lifetime on this planet Earth as well as on other planets. I also glanced at the records of possible future lives of mine. In dreams I have faced my worst fears, I have been in touch with deceased relatives, I have gotten into trouble, I have helped strangers through difficult situations, I have flown in Space Crafts, I was able to breathe under water……..

Some people may say it is all fantasy and not real. Yet I have had dreams that are more real than this physical reality. So much so that at times it feels as if the dream world is the real one and this physical is the illusion.

No, I am not crazy and if you would start opening up to your inner dream world you will understand what I am saying.

My last post was an article from a friend of mine. He suggested dreams as one solution to the current situation. There is a dream I had a few nights back. I want to share it here.

Dream:  I am in a large room and I am talking to my son. He is in another room behind me. I tell him that my head has been itching a lot lately and I am wondering if I have some critters causing it. He says to check my skull. I am a bit reluctant; guess I do not really want to see live critters crawling on my head. I take a deep breath gathering courage and with my left hand I scratch the left side of my skull. I shake my left hand near the floor. Something falls off and begins to crawl away. It is a small, cream color spider. I look at tiny insect and I feel relieved that it isn’t a tick. Somehow the spider doesn’t give me any “bad” feeling and, as a matter of fact she feels harmless and pretty sweet and gentle to me. Taking another deep breath I reach again and dig some more on the left side. This time a tiny black ant crawls away following the same path towards the right as the spider did. I watch the shiny black body move quickly. Once more I feel relieved that it isn’t a tick and I feel the strength of the ant as if it was me. I scratch some more, no more critters appear, only a large amount of white flakes. Gathering courage, I now scratch the right side of my skull to see if anything is hiding there. I shake my right hand forcefully yet nothing seems to be coming out. Suddenly I notice a black dot that quickly jumps off sight. I realize it was a flea. I feel that it was better to find a flea rather than a tick. Also I do not feel any negative reaction towards the discovery of the flea.  I scratch some more and only white flakes come off. I now feel I have checked my head properly and that the insect I was fearing to find was not there at all which made me feel relaxed and happy.

Upon awakening and out of curiosity, I decided to look up the archetypal meaning of the insects I found living in my head. This is what I found:

Spider is associated with the female creative energy. (This is how the spider felt to me, as a gentle feminine energy form)/ It tells the tale of a self-providing home comforting and peaceful.
It represents patience and perseverance to reach a final goal and to succeed with brilliance.

An ant is a symbol of strength, diligence, willpower, honesty, unity, patience, determination, stamina, sacrifice, and loyalty. Despite its minute size, the ant as a spirit animal possesses an immense strength of accomplishment, reminding you that nothing comes easy in life without putting any effort. (The ant gave me a sense of strength in the dream).

A flea shows those of us who have felt victimized or powerless that we really do have tremendous influence, agility, self-preservation and protection abilities.
Flea reminds us of our resilience. The harsh criticism of others may scratch away at our self-esteem, but nothing can crush our spirits if we define ourselves from within. By seeing how big we are inside, instead of focusing on small-minded insults or transgressions from without, we harness our inner strength and can fly even without wings. (I found myself relating closely to this explanation and to some situations I have been facing lately).

I am grateful for the dream and for the message that brought to me through insects.

Finally, out of curiosity, I looked up the archetypal meaning of a tick:

Ticks visit your dreams to bring warnings that you need to be careful at this time. You need to stay detached from all situations, especially ones that are brewing dramas. Beware of those close to you deliberately trying to provoke a reaction out of you. Do not let them get under your skin. Be clear with your boundaries and avoid getting involved.

Something may be draining your energy when tick turns up in your dreams. Is there someone or something like this in your life?

May The Blessings Be!

The definition of insanity

A couple of weeks ago, I asked a friend/mentor of mine what the definition of insanity was. As an answer to my question, he sent me an article he has written recently. I really liked what he had to say on the subject and, with his permission, I am going to post it on my blog.

Your thoughts, personal experiences are always welcome. If you find the information useful, please pass it along to friends and family. No sharing on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter or any social media, please, only post on your personal blogs. Thanks.

If you want to explore in depth the human condition and predicament, I suggest you read his book, “The Land of Po” You can find it on Amazon- a very interesting and revolutionary reading.

 04/21/2020                                         Land of Pō                               R. A. Jurgensen

                                                     Difficult Times


Fear and Loathing in the time of COVID-19


Before masks and 6 feet of separation were ordered, I was shopping at Costco and watching anxious people pushing carts filled with toilet paper, bottled water, and high-calorie, comfort food. I ran into a friend who has held some responsible positions in state government. After greeting, our conversation turned to comments about stressful times and frantic people.

The casual mention of “crazy” came up. Since crazy is a personal and professional favorite of mine and has provided me with a lifetime of employment, two quotes by Friedrich Nietzsche came to mind. For those unfamiliar with Nietzsche, he was a brilliant 19th Century German philosopher, composer, poet, and an astute observer of human nature:

1. When a hundred men stand together, each of them loses his mind and gets another.

Nietzsche’s quote implies that most of us have an individual mind. When we join a group, we stop thinking for ourselves and turn our attention to conforming and striving to establish our place in the hierarchy. This is a natural instinct for all herd animals, including humans, and is motivated by the need for community and survival. In the same way that sheep and wolves congregate, people merge their minds, create a group reality, and become either a herd of sheep, a pack of wolves, or most exciting of all, a herd of sheep managed by a few wolves.

Over time, most people become totally dependent on The Group for validation, their identity, and their truth. A consensus reality of convenience and control becomes the bedrock of social reality with a little r. So, there we are. What’s could possibly go wrong?

2. Insanity in individuals is something rare – but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule. [my emphasis]


When I repeated a semblance of this quote to my friend, his face went blank and then puzzled— a sign of cognitive dissonance. That means that he was being confronted with an idea that is 180 degrees out of phase from his “normal” and socially correct thinking. It had never occurred to him that the very institutions he had honorably worked for could be insane.

He recovered enough to speak and said, “Why would that be?”

The middle of a busy aisle of Costco isn’t the best place for a discussion that is any more complicated than “Where is the gluten-free bread?” so I muttered that long-established group realities aren’t based on Truth but on lies to calm people by telling them what they want to hear and lies to frighten the flock in the desired direction.

Once lying starts, it has to continue or The Lie is exposed. Eventually, the group reality becomes so twisted by its acrobatic lying that it becomes dysfunctional and then certifiably mad (which interestingly means both “insane” and “enraged”). At this point, the same mental-health categories used to describe individuals are directly applicable to the mental health of the collective mind—words like anxious, depressed, paranoid, psychotic, and psychopathic.

Back in Costco and standing in the way of aggressive people on survival missions with shopping carts, my friend and I feared for our survival, so the discussion lapsed and our conversation ended with some socially correct pleasantries.

What’s the takeaway? Unstable times come and go within a person, within families, villages, and countries, but this time, because of our transportation and technology, the destabilization is global. The collective truth has been twisted so many times that it is badly out of alignment with natural law and demonstrates why civilizations throughout history collapse from within. It doesn’t take much imagination to guess what happens to the people who depend on the group for their safety, truth, and sanity as the collective mind spirals downward into darkness and destruction.

Just seeing how and why societies become insane and die isn’t enough. In fact, the awareness of this creates more anxiety and fear. What is the antidote that society uses to combat fear and existential helplessness?


After people are herded together by fear, a popular, time-tested antidote is applied. At that point, the narrative is flipped in order to change the fear into hatred toward another group or an individual. Hatred works because it is a strong and aggressive emotion which obliterates fearful helplessness, but only temporarily, so it has to be applied over and over, again, to keep The Lie from falling apart. Unfortunately, the long-term side effects of obsessive hatred and lying are the erosion and eventual obliteration of the soul (consciousness) of a person and a society.

Maybe there is a solution better than a scorched earth populated by the walking dead. [smiley face with N-95 mask]


We spend a fourth to a third of our lives asleep so the body can recover from the day’s activity. More important, taking a break from waking life for 6 to 8 hours a day allows the Universe to take us on adventures in dimensions not available to our self-absorbed and defended egos.

Dreams disappear quickly, so write down an occasional dream and relive it several times while awake, and you will initiate a natural process of healing and transformation. “Analyzing” a dream is of little value because it turns the dream over to your awake ego, which is spending most of its time avoiding and escaping from insights and truths that daily life and dreams offer.

Instead of analyzing dreams, reexperience them, feel the emotions, and let them affect you. Dreams are gifts that are designed just for you by an intelligent Universe. This style of dream work activates consciousness and reveals attachments that are obstructing your growth while at the same time, balancing and fine tuning your mental, emotional and physical bodies.

Of course, some dreams are frightening, but don’t throw them away with the standard “It isn’t real.” and “It’s just a dream.” Record them even if you have no clue about their meaning and value. Disturbing dreams reveal essential issues at the deepest part of your psyche and can prove invaluable as their meaning unfolds over your lifetime. In the book, Land of Pō, I included dreams in the context of my life to encourage others to do the same, hoping that they will reap the benefits that I have.

If you sincerely engage the process suggested, you will undergo a gradual and relieving withdrawal from your addiction to a deluded society. Then, when people around you become frightened and paranoid, you won’t unwittingly be swept up and drowned in the psychic wave of mob consciousness.

If being a vector and a victim of the current mind virus spreading throughout the globe is too stressful and no longer serving your best interests, you have a choice. All the while that you are being entertained, mesmerized and terrified by the social/political dramas in front of you, there is

a doorway behind you. Turn around and step onto the path that leads away from the madding crowd.

Your dreams will reflect this as you find yourself leaving houses, schoolrooms, offices, and institutions behind and travel on paths and roads that take you to meadows, forests, and oceans filled with creatures. You will find yourself flying like a bird and breathing underwater like a fish, indications that your consciousness has attained some freedom from its self-imposed confinement in the socialized mind.

Eventually you will find creative-energy fields of color and sound—consciousness beyond the storyboard dramas of a confused and self-destructive species.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness … it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness … we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way – in short, the period was … like the present period.

A Tale of Two Cities

—Charles Dickens

In the present period, like all periods, you are offered a choice: wisdom, Light, and Heaven or foolishness, Darkness and Hell. Complicated times aren’t really that complicated after all.


We have been having beautiful sunny weather in Colorado these days.

My latest focus has been on gratitude, realizing God’s love and presence throughout the day.

This morning I decided to go for a walk in the trails of Black Forest. To my surprise, little Georgy, usually the first one out the door when I say, let’s go for a walk, remained quietly sitting on the sofa.

“All right then, if you are not up to it I am going jogging on my own.” I told him as I walked out the back door.

Outside, the air was crisp and windy. Thankfully, I was wearing a long sleeved sweat shirt protecting me from getting chilled.

As I jogged along the trail I could feel unrest deep in my gut. I tried to put it out of mind by paying attention to the breathtaking surroundings. Tall ponderosa pines swinging gently to the breeze, the majestic Pikes Peak Mountain covered with snow rising up into the deep blue Colorado sky, the frogs singing in the puddles of melted snow water. Usually nature opens my heart to feeling gratitude for the wonders and beauty of God’s creation. Not today and that bothered me.

I jogged all the way to a pond that nears the main road of the subdivision. I walked around the pond and found a bench a few steps away from the water. I decided to sit and pay attention to my gut instead of trying to ignore the turmoil.

I immediately recognized the emotion trapped inside me, the old friend called fear.

I took a few deep breaths while my eyes searched the surroundings. Several birds were merrily looking for insects near the banks of the pond.

“How I would love to be just like them right now; enjoying the day, not a care in their minds and hearts.”I sighed. “I feel trapped in this fear and can’t enjoy this very moment.”

“Is it your fear that you are experiencing? Take a deeper look at yourself because it seems to me that you are very calm.” Spirit’s voice whispered in the breeze.

I paused and immediately realized that, in fact, I was very calm and the fear was in the environment surrounding me. As a result, much like a tuning fork, my gut was resonating with that vibration.

“Hmm. Interesting.”I said.

“Perhaps you could call Jeanie and ask her to do a contemplation together to lift up the stagnating fear in the surroundings?”Spirit nudged me softly.

“I am not sure it is a good idea. She might take it the wrong way, not like it. I can do it myself with you, instead.”I replied feeling knots and butterflies in my stomach.

“Where two or more gather in MY name……” Spirit said.

I tried to dismiss Spirit’s nudges and turned my face to the left. I noticed two small birds with a white crown- like stripe around their head and a bright red top. They were heading my way.

“They will fly away as soon as they see me. “ I thought.

“Keep calm and see.”

Both birds came right up to my feet and stayed there eating away as if I didn’t exist.

“It takes two.”Spirit whispered. “Call Jeanie”

Jeanie answered almost immediately and she agreed to sing HU (pronounced like the name Hugh), an ancient name for God that helps to connect us to the Word or Holy Spirit for help and guidance by the opening of the heart center.

As we both opened our hearts in gratitude and love for the Creator, the HU sound created a wave which both of us witnessed on our inner seeing. This 360 degree wave expanded outwards into our surroundings. At that very moment a Hawk flew in and landed on the very top of the Ponderosa Pine standing across the pond in front of me. The bird sang with us for quite some time. With every out breath of the Sound of HU, also called the Sound of Soul, I felt the vibrations around me become softer and calmer until everything was still. The trapped energy of fear had dissipated and in its place the tranquil, joyful energy of Divine Love took hold.

As a reward from Spirit, both Jeanie and I received an energy signature gift. She received a shimmering diamond of light that was placed inside her heart center. I received a Black Pearl the size of a grapefruit, which was placed in the palm of my hands.

Although I don’t know yet the spiritual significance of the gift of a Black shining Pearl, I am looking forward to learning about it and I am grateful for the gift of Love.

I can only imagine what the HU wave of divine love that was created this morning by two God loving people will do when it touches everything and everyone in ITS path.

Blessings to all!!!

Pikes Peak

The Cleanse

A week ago I decided to change my diet in order to cleanse my liver and support my digestive system and overall health.

I started juicing several times a day fresh, organic vegetables and fruits and taking some supplements that help detoxify the liver. I added to the mixture a daily routine of one mile jogging and two to three miles walk (my little Georgy can only take one mile of jogging a day) plus plenty of fresh water.

The detox is reaching deeper than I expected. In fact, the first two nights I woke up drenched in sweat several times. The sweating would last for about a minute or so and then my body would go back to normal. In the morning I would wake up feeling my entire body shaking inside, as when one gets anxious or overly excited. Old and seemingly forgotten memories would surface unexpectedly during the course of the day bringing up pent up bitterness and boiling rage deep inside my gut.

One day, while jogging, a sudden realization of self hatred and self blame over past choices hit me like a bolt of lightning. I had no idea I was keeping these emotions stored away in some remote area of my subconscious.

As the week progressed I began to wake up regularly at 1:00 am every single night as if an internal alarm system had been set up to go off at that time and jolt me out of a deep sleep.

I began to feel some concern because the lack of sleep was affecting me during the day.  How much longer was I going to be able to sustain this state of affairs?

Exhausted from yet another sleepless night, I turned to Spirit for guidance one morning asking what was causing my sleep and emotional imbalance. I immediately had a vision of the space my consciousness was fixated upon day and night.

Having more time than usual in my hands because of the lockdown, I got into the habit of watching a bunch of podcasts in the alternative media. I was doing so right before going to bed thus, whatever the latest development in this seemingly unending nightmare was for the day, it would be the last thing my mind had placed its attention upon.

I was shown that because of my deep interest in keeping up with information I was living in the world being broadcasted, one of confusion, opposing views, discord, animosity and constant fear. Spirit suggested I reduce the amount of videos I watch and that at night before going to sleep to place my attention on something joyful and peaceful. Spirit also nudged me to check online what organ was active at 1:00 am (in oriental medicine, each organ has a span of time during the day or night when they are active)

So, I stopped watching online news videos before dinner and I actually turned off not only my computer but also my cell phone and the house WI-Fi. Amazingly I slept for seven hours straight! Best sleep I had in a while.

This morning I remembered to check online for the active organ at 1:00 am. Surprise! It is the liver! Yes, the liver becomes active during the times of 1:00 – 3:00 am. In fact, according to Chinese medicine, this is the time when the body goes into deep sleep, gets rejuvenated, the blood gets detoxified and the entire system recovers from the day. When one wakes up during these hours it is a sign of unresolved anger or of high levels of stress. Does it sound familiar?

The picture and the steps I need to correct the imbalance suddenly are clear as day. To wrap it all up perfectly I drew a card from the deck: “Learn how to keep balance”

I never tire to marvel at the constant love and guidance the Holy Spirit gives to each of us if we only dare to ask.

Love and blessings to all,


What I am learning during the fear pandemic

Interestingly enough this morning contemplation seed card told me that “Life is a constant opportunity to reinvent yourself.”

I say that it is interesting because last night I had started writing this post. I had about half of it done before going to sleep. When I returned back to it to complete it today, the document was nowhere to be found in my computer. Hmm, it makes you wonder.

Perhaps my post needs to be revised, or reinvented under a different light. On that note, let me get started and this time, just to be sure, I won’t stop until it is finished and published.

Returning to the message from this morning’s card, the world at large seems to be having the spiritual opportunity to reinvent itself, hopefully in a better sense.

During this chaotic time of change, called by names like, “the end times”, “the apocalypse”, “the great awakening” etc, life as we know it is quickly dissipating to find ourselves facing the unknown.

What will our future life look like? All around us a very palpable feeling of dread is felt. News media all over the world keeps spreading and fueling the fear with images and words of doomsday being pounded into our psyche day in and day out. The proverbial divide and conquer adage is being played out right under our noses as frightened people search for like minded individuals to share in their understanding of what is happening and find comfort and approval that their side of the story is the one and only truth and the rest of deluded people need to comply with them either willingly or by force. The interesting thing is that there are as many divided truths as there are people thinking them. Some examples would be absolute statements as: “black lives matter”  “white men are white supremacists” etc…

What do you think this does to ALL of us? It only pits us against one another with very dangerous results for ALL of us regardless of our race, beliefs, country of origin etc…

Anyway, I am not here to write about what you should think, feel, believe or do in times like these, those are entirely your choice.

I am going to share with you my personal spiritual journey and what the Holy Spirit has been showing and teaching me. This process began a little over a couple of weeks ago when Spirit started to nudge me to take a break from watching alternative media videos on a daily basis. So I took an entire weekend off computer and cell phone and instead I went walking in the park with my dog, got a lot of sunshine, and did some reading and watercolor painting. I began to feel different, lighter and happier and my connection to Spirit got stronger. At a certain point Spirit showed me that everything happening around the world was perfectly all right from a spiritual standpoint. The experiences people were having were their opportunity to expand their awareness and grow spiritually if they so chose.

“Let people be.” Spirit said. A deep sense of peace and joy descended upon me with the realization.

As I returned to electronics and daily life, the higher awareness I had reached began to dwindle and my attention returned to the daily images of doomsday. In my naive mind I thought I was well above any of the news I was watching and the fear. As day passed, some of my friends and family succumbed to the fear and began to act in paranoia. I found myself quite upset about it and started to judge them in my mind. It was at this time that I went by my apartment to get some things I needed to take back to my workplace and found three fortune cookies sitting on the dining table and one opened fortune next to them. They were obviously my son’s fortunes, but I leaned over to read the small piece of paper.

It said: “A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.” I felt uneasy, something deep inside was nudging me to pay attention and I didn’t want to. “This is my son’s fortune and it has nothing to do with me.” I dismiss it.

Following that I received the news that my job was going to end because my employers had decided to relocate and sell the home I had been managing for the past two years. My world was crumbling. The news didn’t surprise me much as Spirit had already nudged me that it was coming. Yet, I felt fear shaking in my gut, “what am I going to do now?”

I decided to turn to my spiritual mentor for help in processing the fear and I texted him requesting a session. He kindly declined to help me and nudged me to work it directly with Spirit.

His reply didn’t surprise me as he made me realize that it is time for me to strengthen my direct line with Spirit and God without intermediaries.

Yet the fear inside me was still festering and I was doing a great job at ignoring it. A friend of mine posted something on Facebook that stirred up a strong reaction in me. So I made a reply with the “good intention” to have her see beyond what TV is programming people to believe. Days later I sent her link to a video I thought she would like and asked her to call me. She replied letting me know that she would not call me and that she didn’t like the fact that I would tell her what to watch and what to do. My first reaction was to get mad at her, but knowing better, I took a look at what she was pointing out and realized she had all the right to be upset as I had crossed over a boundary. I wrote back to her apologizing. She never answered and has terminated my friendship on Facebook.

I was very sad about it and flipped flopped from anger to pain for several days all the while asking Spirit to show me the root of my behavior and how to heal it.

One morning at work, as I was looking out the window into the backyard I noticed a large animal walking around. I went to the balcony to get a better look and realized it was a young Mountain Lion. The animal was calmly exploring the surroundings and enjoying it. I watched him until it disappeared in the forest.

That evening I sat down and wrote this entry in my journal.


Dearest Holy Spirit, well I have done it again and hopefully this time I will learn to keep my reactive side in check. You had told me a couple of days ago to let others have their reactions and feelings during this fake pandemic, Covid-19. In retrospect I realize that I am in a PTSD reactive mode, though I wasn’t really aware of it. Yes, it sure feels like Venezuela all over again, though it isn’t quite like it in so many ways. After watching friends and family fall one after the other for the fake news narrative I felt it was my “duty” to shed some light and tell them the truth. Obviously one can do so in a certain way but not me I just go in full force! So today when I came to work and looked outside the window, I saw a beautiful Mountain Lion walking peacefully in the backyard. I watched the graceful movements of his muscular body in awe. It was the first time I saw one in the backyard and so close to the house. I checked online for the spiritual meaning of such incredible and rare sight knowing it was a strong sign from you. Well, it said to me that it is a sign to learn how to blend together grace and strength so that one doesn’t become a dictator.

With my direct words replying to a comment from a friend, I overstepped my bounds and caused pain to her and her rightful angry reaction towards me. I have apologized to her but now I have fallen into self-deprecation and self-hatred and the old desire to run away because I feel so ashamed of myself and so unworthy of forgiveness and love.  It is time for me to heal this wound with your love and help my dearest Spirit. I have been keeping my heart so closed to me and I have been so judgmental of others unconsciously protecting this feeling of shame and unworthiness I have had for as long as I can remember. A revelation came to me today while in the throes of my demise, both my parents never liked me, never loved me and never forgave me for my mistakes. Then the realization went further, my entire Italian family never liked me and never accepted me and recently never forgave me for my mistakes. With this I don’t want to point out fingers, that is not what the realization is about, the realization is about the fact that this wound is one that runs in every single individual in my family and by each and every one of us being unable and unwilling to open up the hidden pain and hidden self disdain and rejection, we continue to point fingers out and judge others as to not feel what is inside of all of us. If I am the “black sheep”, the one who strayed, then they are justified in pushing me away, judge me harshly and not forgive me because I deserve it. This is exactly how they feel about themselves and are afraid of showing or taking risks outside “the clan” because then they will become outcasts. So I am now grateful for this experience because it brought me straight into this wound and I no longer want to protect it or hide it. I do hope that my dear friend will forgive my indiscretion some day. Yet even if she doesn’t she would have given me a gift of love by putting me in my place as I did deserve it. Now the rest of the work is between me and Spirit. I want to clean up this messy inner house of all the stench of self-hatred (which in the past was projected onto others), shame, guilt, unworthiness and the deep desire to punish and hurt myself because of it. I am opening it all up with so much gratitude. Thank you for the gift of love today!”

The next day I got the nudge to sit in the backyard and read from the book “Letting Go. The pathway of surrender.”

I opened it at random while asking for guidance and it opened up to letting go of Pride. “What does pride have to do with anything?” I thought.

As I read through it, statements like, “pride may take the form of denial, being opinionated, unforgiving, rigid, patronizing, judgmental” and “Intellectual pride leads to ignorance, and spiritual pride is the main block to spiritual development and maturation in everyone” and “in all of us, the prideful feeling, “I have the answers,” blocks our growth and development.” All of these statements resonated as being true for me. The answer to a prideful heart and mind is true humility.

“When you allow others to be, to make their own choices, you are exerting the greatest form of humility and love towards another Soul.” Spirit whispered gently.

So here it is my spiritual opportunity to reinvent myself: a new Self that lives and breathes Divine Spirit in every situation to the best of my ability. I opened a fortune cookie and the new message was: “Act as if it were impossible to fail.”

Best to all of you and much love!

Opening The Heart ……

In my last post I left off after I had adopted little Jay.

 As I mentioned, I could not take him home with me the day of the adoption because he needed to be neutered and so I had to return to get him the following day after five in the afternoon. I took advantage of the time to prepare for his home coming and bought a harness and leash, a couple of bowls, a dog band in case he wasn’t house trained and some food.

The next day, I invited my son to come along and meet the little guy.

When we arrived at the Humane Society’s animal pick up office I immediately noticed on the wall behind the counter a large tag with the name JAY and under it, in bold letters, it read: Heart Murmur.

My son and I looked at each other wondering what that was all about. The young woman on the other side of the counter approached us and asked for the adoption papers, then turned around, picked up the tag on the wall and handed us some more papers to read and sign. She proceeded to explain to us that the vet had found a heart murmur when he examined Jay prior to being sterilized.

“If you no longer want to adopt him because of his heart condition, you need to sign this paper and we will take him back into the kennel.” She said matter of fact.

I was stunned and felt a wave of rage building inside my belly.

“I need to take some time to think about this.” I replied.

“You need to let me know today before we close at 6.” She answered.

“I have almost an hour to think about it.” I snapped back at her pointing the finger at the wall clock. I was getting annoyed at her lack of compassion and her “it is just business” attitude.

“Oh, sure, take your time.” She said as she walked away to help another person.

“Let’s go to the car. I need to regroup and think about this deal.” I told my son while walking towards the door.

My head and emotions were spinning out of control. I wasn’t prepared for this. The unexpected news had brought back images of Sammy, my toy poodle who had a heart murmur and had died of congestive heart failure.

The old pain of watching my beloved dog die from a heart condition had resurfaced. Why was Spirit matching me with a dog with a heart problem? Then again, what was up with this “heart theme”?

I wanted to run away from opening my heart to Jay if it meant that I would have to deal with the pain of losing him. At that moment I thought of the lady I had met the prior day and who had not allowed herself to love another dog because of the pain of losing it. Was I being that lady now? Was I telling Spirit how my experience with another dog would have to be in order for me to adopt one?

“I need to contemplate on this. I am reacting to the past and projecting it onto Jay and that is not fair to either one of us.” I said to my son.

I closed my eyes and took several deep breaths to calm myself. The Light of the Holy Spirit came into my inner vision readily and my heart began to ache once more.

“Show me what is best for all concerned, oh God.” I prayed silently.

A beautiful meadow of soft green grass bathed in golden light stretched out against a bright blue sky above and little Jay was running around happy and free. My heart opened up at the inner vision and my lips relaxed into a smile.

“Let’s get my little boy.”

And Jay came into my life and with him a new chapter began.

There is more to the story and it will have to wait until my next post.

In the meantime, I ask you and myself to consider how many times during our lives we walk away from an opportunity to open our hearts even if they ache from old pains.

May The Blessing Be!


My apologies for taking this long to write a post, so much has been going on and I have been looking at life unfolding in a steady forward movement and wondering what it is all about.

After some innermost reflection it all seems to lead to one thing no matter how much I try to make it into something else: life is about opening our hearts in order to experience the love within every single aspect of it.

I am sitting at my desk with the latest addition to my life snuggled comfortably on my lap, a little Chihuahua dog I named Georgy. Outside a blizzard has been blowing snow all day long without an end in sight.  Yes, it is the perfect moment and day to sit down and write a post. No excuses.

So, where to begin? I guess from the beginning of the latest adventures. I will need to roll back time all the way to January 21st. I will also need to give some background information to make the story clearer.

I work in Black Forest, Colorado managing a household comprised of a middle aged couple and three dogs, two Great Danes, Scarlett and Lulu and one toy poodle, Moose. I enjoy my work there as I get to spend much of my time caring for the doggies while their parents travel around the world mostly for work.

Every year the dogs leave for about two months to be with their parents at their other home in D.C. and every time my heart aches as I watch them happily leave.

When the time for their departure drew closer my heart ached more so than ever before.

Around the same time I began having a strong desire to have a dog of my own again. It had been over two years since I had my own pet.

 Once I got the approval from my employers to bring my own pet over whenever I would be watching their babies, I began searching online for a dog to adopt. I wanted a small one, 10 lbs or less and one that was already house broken; older dog and I would even consider a senior dog. I filled out numerous online applications and each time the dog I was looking for would be either denied to me or no longer available. A couple of weeks went by and I was beginning to feel discouraged by the results of my search. I really didn’t think it would be this difficult to adopt a dog with so many out there in need of a home.

A week before the dogs were scheduled to depart I decided to drive out to a shelter that rescued Mill dogs. On my way there I was listening to a Christian station and these two songs came on back to back. The first song, “Tell your heart to beat again by Danny Gokey, had been on my mind for several days. The station had never played it for as long as I had been listening.

Tears rolled down my cheeks as I listened to the familiar lyrics; my heart ached with every beat. The next song, the latest by Mercy Me, “We are almost home,” brought more tears along with a sense of renewed hope to my ailing heart.

“Why is my heart hurting this much?” I wondered, knowing that it had to be more than just about wanting the company of a dog. “What is the Holy Spirit trying to tell me through these two songs today?”

Nothing really prepared me for what I experienced during the visit to the mill dog rescue shelter. These dogs were so beautiful and yet so broken and scared from a life of neglect and abuse. They had lived locked up in tiny cages, never touched or loved, not knowing what the feeling of running free on fresh grass or sunbathing was like. I could feel their deep pain and desire for love and yet the fear of the new and unfamiliar surroundings was far greater and getting in the way of them opening up their sweet hearts to receiving love.

I took the ID numbers of two dogs I felt connected to although I wanted to take them all with me. I was told that I needed to go through a lengthy process before I could qualify to adopt one of their dogs. I was upset at the news and left the place quite disappointed but determined to go through the qualification steps.

As soon as I got home, I filled out the online application and then proceeded to watch the video they provided explaining the reasons for the lengthy and detailed process. Watching the video I realized that I wasn’t in a place where I could actually provide all the care and training these babies needed. For some of them the scars ran so deep that they would never really be “normal” dogs.

I returned to the shelter the next day hoping to see the two dogs I had chosen. On my way there, once more the two songs came on back to back just like the first time.

“What are the odds of this happening?” I wondered. “Something is up.”

Both dogs had already been given in adoption to someone else. Even though I felt disappointed I knew that this wasn’t the venue for me to find my pup.

That night I had a dream and in it I was bathing in the light of the Holy Spirit when I noticed angels inviting the dogs that were in the shelter I had visited to come into the divine Light. I watched as the Holy Spirit began to heal their broken hearts and mine too! I woke up feeling once more a deep ache in my heart.

That day I went to the Humane Society to check out their dogs. Only one of them was small enough and when he met me he didn’t show any interest. I left disappointed once more and ready to give up the search altogether.

The day came when the dogs I care for left. I felt so much grief that I decided to go to the Mall and look at the dogs at their pet store. On my way there I saw dogs walking on the street everywhere.

“This is so unusual. There are never dogs walking on the streets!” I wondered.

While watching the pups play happily in their glass cages, I got a strong nudge to drive to the Humane Society before it would close for the day.

“Why go all the way there again? There was nothing suitable a couple of days ago!”

The nudge got stronger and so I gave in and drove all the way to the other end of town where the shelter was located.

 In the very front window there was this tiny pup curled up, eyes closed tight, shaking. He was a two months old Chihuahua mix dog.

“What is the story of this one?” I asked the attendant.

“He was returned because he didn’t get along with the house dog.”He answered.

“How can this little thing not get along?” I replied

The volunteer went to the computer to check for more information. It turned out that the dog had been surrendered to the shelter by the owners because it was the one leftover from a litter that they could not sell. A woman had adopted him and when she took him home, her dog wanted to play with him but the pup was too scared to play and so she returned him.

I was crushed. This dog was so tiny, he fit in the palm of my hand and by the time he would be full grown he would be no more than two lbs. I was considering taking him even if he was way too small and he was a pup that needed to be trained. A woman about my age approached me and looked at the little one.

“Do Chihuahuas bark a lot? I live in an apartment building and cannot have a barker.” I asked the volunteer.

“Yes, they do, very much so.” He answered.

“That’s not true, I have had Chihuahuas all my life and they only bark if some strange person comes to the door.” The woman standing next to me replied promptly.

“Do you have a Chihuahua?”I asked her

“No, not right now,” she replied. “I lost my last one three years ago.”

“Well, here is your new baby waiting for you!” I blurted out while pointing my finger at the little one.

She took a closer look. “I really didn’t come here to get a dog. I was dropping off some blankets that the shelter can use.” She mumbled while studying carefully the dog. I told her the story of how the pup had arrived at the shelter.  “Okay, I will take a look. Can I see him?” She asked the volunteer.

I smiled and walked to check out the other dogs available.

A small, short hair, full grown Chihuahua was sitting calmly inside his pen oblivious of all the dogs barking around him. Our eyes made contact right away.

“What is this little guy’s story?” I asked the volunteer.

“We named him Jay. He was found wandering the streets. Nobody has claimed him. We really don’t know much about him.” He replied.

“Can I see him?” I asked.

“Sure, follow me into one of our meeting rooms and I will bring him over.”

I sat on the floor not wanting to tower over the little fellow and perhaps intimidate him. He came in wagging his tail. I nudged him to come over. He readily trotted my way, I leaned over and he licked my nose.

“I will take him.” I said without thinking it twice. The volunteered smiled happily “The other lady took the Chihuahua puppy, so you know.” He announced. “You will need to go into the waiting room and you will be called to sign the adoptions papers. Jay needs to be neutered so you won’t be getting him home with you today but he will be ready for pick up tomorrow late afternoon.” He explained

There were three of us waiting to be called to sign the adoption papers. One was the lady I had enticed to take home the little Chihuahua mix, the other one a young woman who was placing a hold on a sweet Beagle pup.

The young woman asked the older lady how she had lost her Chihuahua.

“It is a sad story,” she said. “It happened three years ago and it hurt so much that I promised myself to never get another dog. Today I came here to donate some blankets, never thinking of adopting anything, that’s for sure. Then this lady here (she pointed at me) convinced me to take a look at the little guy and when I held him in my hands I was in love all over again. But going back to the story, I had a tiny female Chihuahua and I always took her along with me whenever I went on overseas trips. This one time I was told by the airline that I could not take her with me in the cabin because there was already another person with a dog and they only allowed one dog in cabin per trip. Not wanting to send her as luggage, I asked a friend to watch her for me while I was gone and when I returned my dog had died.” She paused.

“Did your dog get sick while you were gone?” I asked

With teary eyes and choking on her words the lady whispered, “She died of a broken heart. She felt abandoned.”

At that moment, when the woman opened her heart to let out the pain she had kept locked inside for years, I felt God’s grace descend upon us in the silence of the room bringing solace and comfort.

I wondered how different the events of that day would have been if I would have turned a deaf ear to my inner nudge. Perhaps this lady would have walked past the tiny Chihuahua puppy without giving him a second look; perhaps I would have missed out on Jay licking my nose.

“Tell your heart to beat again” came to mind. It seemed to me that both of us were telling our hearts to beat again, to open again in order to give and receive love and in so doing healing and joy found its way back into our lives.

I will stop here for now. I will continue the story for next time.

Till then, tell your hearts to beat again because we are almost home!